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Feb 15, 2012 19:56:38 GMT -8
Post by GGFan on Feb 15, 2012 19:56:38 GMT -8
My name is GGFan. I have won over 150 tournaments across three different continents, and am undoubtedly the greatest Pokemon player of all time. As you all know, I announced my retirement on July of last year and flew to my home in the Bahamas. After defeating everybody placed before me, I lived with the regret that I, the last defender of truth and justice left in an incorrigible world ran by deceitful reprobates, would be gone. There would be nobody left.
I was okay with this. I did everything in my power for you people. Most of you gave me the respect that I deserved, though a few of you thought it would prudent to ostracize me from your conceptualized paradise. This didn't bother me, because I didn't need you to win more tournaments than anybody in the history of this industry. I became an international icon, winning tournaments across the globe and, by proxy, giving myself a far more credible claim as being "the greatest ever" than any of your brand-name favorites. In a pitiful attempt to undermine my legacy, some of you have spread your inane calumny towards me; however, to an intelligent man such as myself, your words are nothing more than crude libel that is reflective of your own insecurities. You always wanted the best, yet the best never conformed to your empire of lying and chicanery.
So what made me decide to come back? Not only do I possess unparalleled prowess, but magnanimity. I am a good man. I am an honest man. Because of my golden heart, I realized that people would be without a role model. I am not exaggerating when I say that I have always viewed myself as a hero, because I have triumphed against adversity throughout my life. Given the thousands of emails I have received from people thanking me for everything I've done over the last decade and begging me to come back (by the way, you can send me your words of support and encouragement at GGFanHappyLegend@gmail.com.), I decided not to eschew the trite practice of coming to peace with one's regrets. I would regret it if I came back knowing who would be reduced to irrevocable torment.
I'm coming back for Garrin Red.
Garrin Red has never had a role model in his life. He doesn't know anything. He is susceptible to the illusion that has been propagated for the longest time. How easy it is for somebody as impressionable as he is to fit in the combine. Unfortunately, most of you don't possess my erudition and immaculate judgement. Lies, cowardice, and hypocrisy are easily discernible for me. In fact, they sicken me. I've never lied or contradicted myself, because I never wanted to be half a human being. But there's somebody who not only had any issues with disseminating his wickedness, but took things a step further.
I'm referring to you, Kevin Garrett. Allow me to elaborate: Kevin Garrett is a liar, Kevin Garrett is a coward, Kevin Garrett is a hypocrite--and, most of all, Kevin Garrett has no respect for those who are better. Four years ago, Kevin Garrett--like so many others--attempted to live off of my success, so he used my name on ShoddyBattle. He did this to the exultation of his craven friends, who are just as pathetic as he is. Did you think I didn't know? Did you think I forgot? No, I didn't. I demand restitution, and I will obtain it. Eventually, I will humiliate you and expose you as irreverent to those who paved the way for punks like you. How long have you been playing, Kevin? How long have you have been recognized as "one of the best," boy? Two, maybe three years? I have been on top for 10 years. The very mention of my name has elicited more attention in one week then your success ever has. My revenge will make it apropos that your favorite Pokemon is Infernape, because you're nothing more than a filthy, flaming monkey!
It's not just Garrin Red who doesn't have a role model. In reality, most of you are shockingly truculent and have minds that are so infantile that you'll believe anything espoused from the illusion. Yet when I say something, you simply turn to the opposition and inflict opprobrium on yourselves by doing so. You don't deserve to exist if you honestly believe my success has been the result of "alternate accounts," and that I've only been successful in one generation. Let me remind all of you in that, in 2008, I became the first player to win a tournament in every extant generation in one calendar year. I 6-0d your ambassador, Hipmonlee, to win a tournament before. I defeated ViL in his home turf. I beat Nitro with a team of 5 Pokemon. I beat German legend peter pan to win the first of my 10 tournaments in the German circuit. I was the #56 ranked player on Pokemon Online before I was unjustly banned by an obscure sycophant who clearly acquiesces to your libel and corrupt authority--surely, I would been #1 before long. No, I have established myself as one of the most versatile players to have ever played.
I have not come back for the purpose of winning more tournaments, because I need not engage in ruthless violence to exhibit my virility. I am already equivalent to a champion gladiator who killed the lions with his bare hands, slayed 960 men single-handedly, and freed a nation from a tyrannical regime. I have come back because this world suffers from a paucity of honor and respect. While I was gone, people have tried to live vicariously through Kevin Garrett's egregious wickedness--which sickens me. Moreover, how hypocritical that you cowards exhort others to defame me by spreading the illusion. Therefore, I decided to move back to my beautiful apartment in my disgusting hometown of New York, because I need to immerse myself in an epicenter of indolent and pretentious losers in order to acclimate myself to the similar world of Pokemon.
However, it would be a platitude to say that I believe that respect is earned. I have been respected ever since I could remember--not only because I was a precocious infant--but because I knew what people wanted. People have an intrinsic dislike to others' opinions that is vehement in nature, which made me realize early on what it meant to be better than everybody else. People envy me because they know that, no matter how hard they try, they'll never be as good. In the Pokemon world, nobody will ever come close to breaking my record of won tournaments, or my streak of having won at least one tournament that lasted for seven long years. That's why you don't like me. It's not because you've identified me as the "other," but because I am miracle. I am practically a god here, and because of that you are disreputable in your presentation as a convergence of greatness. You have the castle, but not the king. You have Rome, but not its emperor. I am the conqueror of your kingdom, and you know it's true.
Be sure that nobody will exculpate you for these iniquities. I have been forgiving for far too long, and now the time has come for me to springboard back into prominence. Some of you have criticized me for my recent ineptitude, and rightfully so: I haven't been on the radar lately. My departure was incongruous with my magical tenure here. But that's ok: I was the better man even in defeat, because leave it to the illusion to ignore my incredulous 25-5 streak prior to my exit. Even when I was exhausted from your malice and petulant envy and ready to retire to my home in the Bahamas, I had the match of the year against Nitro in what was a 200-turn classic. Now, imagine how efficacious I can be when I'm dedicated--well, you don't need to, because many results of my success remain extant.
201152
501122
052211
02/15/12
This is my saga, not yours. Nobody but me or somebody whom I've appointed can write it. I thought the book was closed, but I have opened it again and have written the next chapter: "GGFan renders the liars, cowards, and hypocrites who have ineffectually tried to sabotage him helpless to his mighty rebukes."
I was okay with this. I did everything in my power for you people. Most of you gave me the respect that I deserved, though a few of you thought it would prudent to ostracize me from your conceptualized paradise. This didn't bother me, because I didn't need you to win more tournaments than anybody in the history of this industry. I became an international icon, winning tournaments across the globe and, by proxy, giving myself a far more credible claim as being "the greatest ever" than any of your brand-name favorites. In a pitiful attempt to undermine my legacy, some of you have spread your inane calumny towards me; however, to an intelligent man such as myself, your words are nothing more than crude libel that is reflective of your own insecurities. You always wanted the best, yet the best never conformed to your empire of lying and chicanery.
So what made me decide to come back? Not only do I possess unparalleled prowess, but magnanimity. I am a good man. I am an honest man. Because of my golden heart, I realized that people would be without a role model. I am not exaggerating when I say that I have always viewed myself as a hero, because I have triumphed against adversity throughout my life. Given the thousands of emails I have received from people thanking me for everything I've done over the last decade and begging me to come back (by the way, you can send me your words of support and encouragement at GGFanHappyLegend@gmail.com.), I decided not to eschew the trite practice of coming to peace with one's regrets. I would regret it if I came back knowing who would be reduced to irrevocable torment.
I'm coming back for Garrin Red.
Garrin Red has never had a role model in his life. He doesn't know anything. He is susceptible to the illusion that has been propagated for the longest time. How easy it is for somebody as impressionable as he is to fit in the combine. Unfortunately, most of you don't possess my erudition and immaculate judgement. Lies, cowardice, and hypocrisy are easily discernible for me. In fact, they sicken me. I've never lied or contradicted myself, because I never wanted to be half a human being. But there's somebody who not only had any issues with disseminating his wickedness, but took things a step further.
I'm referring to you, Kevin Garrett. Allow me to elaborate: Kevin Garrett is a liar, Kevin Garrett is a coward, Kevin Garrett is a hypocrite--and, most of all, Kevin Garrett has no respect for those who are better. Four years ago, Kevin Garrett--like so many others--attempted to live off of my success, so he used my name on ShoddyBattle. He did this to the exultation of his craven friends, who are just as pathetic as he is. Did you think I didn't know? Did you think I forgot? No, I didn't. I demand restitution, and I will obtain it. Eventually, I will humiliate you and expose you as irreverent to those who paved the way for punks like you. How long have you been playing, Kevin? How long have you have been recognized as "one of the best," boy? Two, maybe three years? I have been on top for 10 years. The very mention of my name has elicited more attention in one week then your success ever has. My revenge will make it apropos that your favorite Pokemon is Infernape, because you're nothing more than a filthy, flaming monkey!
It's not just Garrin Red who doesn't have a role model. In reality, most of you are shockingly truculent and have minds that are so infantile that you'll believe anything espoused from the illusion. Yet when I say something, you simply turn to the opposition and inflict opprobrium on yourselves by doing so. You don't deserve to exist if you honestly believe my success has been the result of "alternate accounts," and that I've only been successful in one generation. Let me remind all of you in that, in 2008, I became the first player to win a tournament in every extant generation in one calendar year. I 6-0d your ambassador, Hipmonlee, to win a tournament before. I defeated ViL in his home turf. I beat Nitro with a team of 5 Pokemon. I beat German legend peter pan to win the first of my 10 tournaments in the German circuit. I was the #56 ranked player on Pokemon Online before I was unjustly banned by an obscure sycophant who clearly acquiesces to your libel and corrupt authority--surely, I would been #1 before long. No, I have established myself as one of the most versatile players to have ever played.
I have not come back for the purpose of winning more tournaments, because I need not engage in ruthless violence to exhibit my virility. I am already equivalent to a champion gladiator who killed the lions with his bare hands, slayed 960 men single-handedly, and freed a nation from a tyrannical regime. I have come back because this world suffers from a paucity of honor and respect. While I was gone, people have tried to live vicariously through Kevin Garrett's egregious wickedness--which sickens me. Moreover, how hypocritical that you cowards exhort others to defame me by spreading the illusion. Therefore, I decided to move back to my beautiful apartment in my disgusting hometown of New York, because I need to immerse myself in an epicenter of indolent and pretentious losers in order to acclimate myself to the similar world of Pokemon.
However, it would be a platitude to say that I believe that respect is earned. I have been respected ever since I could remember--not only because I was a precocious infant--but because I knew what people wanted. People have an intrinsic dislike to others' opinions that is vehement in nature, which made me realize early on what it meant to be better than everybody else. People envy me because they know that, no matter how hard they try, they'll never be as good. In the Pokemon world, nobody will ever come close to breaking my record of won tournaments, or my streak of having won at least one tournament that lasted for seven long years. That's why you don't like me. It's not because you've identified me as the "other," but because I am miracle. I am practically a god here, and because of that you are disreputable in your presentation as a convergence of greatness. You have the castle, but not the king. You have Rome, but not its emperor. I am the conqueror of your kingdom, and you know it's true.
Be sure that nobody will exculpate you for these iniquities. I have been forgiving for far too long, and now the time has come for me to springboard back into prominence. Some of you have criticized me for my recent ineptitude, and rightfully so: I haven't been on the radar lately. My departure was incongruous with my magical tenure here. But that's ok: I was the better man even in defeat, because leave it to the illusion to ignore my incredulous 25-5 streak prior to my exit. Even when I was exhausted from your malice and petulant envy and ready to retire to my home in the Bahamas, I had the match of the year against Nitro in what was a 200-turn classic. Now, imagine how efficacious I can be when I'm dedicated--well, you don't need to, because many results of my success remain extant.
201152
501122
052211
02/15/12
This is my saga, not yours. Nobody but me or somebody whom I've appointed can write it. I thought the book was closed, but I have opened it again and have written the next chapter: "GGFan renders the liars, cowards, and hypocrites who have ineffectually tried to sabotage him helpless to his mighty rebukes."